Editor’s Note: Recently, Liberty Nation received extraordinary documents from DiaboLeaks containing lectures straight out of hell. They provide unique insight into the inner workings and machinations of devils in infiltrating and corrupting the minds of humans. Each week, we will post a different Lecture from Hell. The demonic influence revealed is shocking. This short parody was inspired by the wonderful work of C.S. Lewis in his entertaining and enlightening epistolary novel, The Screwtape Letters, written in 1942.
My dear gentledevils,
A mere 160 years ago, a despicable Christian named Charles Darwin published what could have been a disaster for us, On The Origins of Species. In it, he details a scientific explanation of Creation itself. If Christians ever were to discover and learn his work, we would have a massive challenge on our hands. Fortunately, Karl Marx came to our rescue.
Unlike our other allies at the time, Marx saw in Darwin something other demons missed. He saw an opportunity to convince them that if Creation followed a long-winded process of natural selection, this was somehow proof that the Enemy does not exist! Can you believe it?
Charles Darwin
I know, I know, on the surface, this sounds like a fool’s errand. Imagine that you opened an intricate clockwork and declared that you could only see cogwheels and no Creator. That would be crazy, right? Well, Marx pulled it off. We don’t know how, but he managed to convince them that they would have to deny evolution to be Christian.
For hundreds of years, we have been trying to sneak science out of Christian hands, and suddenly, Marx came along and said some fancy words, and they just handed it to him on a silver platter! Can you now see why he is the favorite pet of Our Father Below?
I see some questions forming in the audience… Oh, you want to know why we don’t want the Christians to know the secrets of biology?
Well, that’s easy. Darwin discovered that humans have a nature. Of course, that has been common knowledge for eons, but he provided a scientific explanation that would have deepened their self-knowledge and appreciation of their age-old wisdom. What is the nature of humans? The Enemy created them as man and woman, two genders, to multiply and be fruitful. Did you know that the beasts who most resemble the humans, the apes, have no fathers? The nuclear family with a father who knows his children is uniquely human.
And whereas the beasts live from hand to mouth, the Enemy endowed humans with the secret of giving up pleasures in the present for gains in the future. That is how they learned to obey the law and to act for a heavenly reward, although we have lured them to be naughty sometimes.
Karl Marx
Do you see how problematic it would be for us if the humans ever learned that their folk knowledge could be understood and appreciated scientifically? Thanks to Marx, rational people can more easily be convinced that Christians are unscientific flat-earthers who prefer to believe in fairytales rather than listening to the experts.
Remember, Our Father Below is leading a rebellion against Creation. We want humans to abandon their nature, not revel in it! Therefore, I am pleased to say that the silly flesh creatures don’t know what we have done. Marx’s intellectual heirs are working hard in universities to dismantle human nature as a social construct.
And it’s working! They have nearly stopped multiplying, and their women are chasing careers in cubicles instead of mothering children. The nuclear family is fading away, and ever more children are growing up without a father. These half-orphans are one of our most precious food sources, and we provide them with the father they so desperately need – Our Father Below.
Amazingly, they suspect nothing. I am therefore convinced that humanity soon will dwindle and die and bring about the End of Days, and we will revel in the glorious victory! That is, if – if – they don’t learn of Darwin’s secrets.
Until next time,
Professor Thornside
Previous lectures by the (not-so) good professor, include: Demonic Ventriloquism, Truth Is a lie, Word Control Is Mind Control, A Happy Coincidence, Outshine the Enemy, Make Them Hate the Rainbow, The Art of a Devil’s Bargain, No Forgiveness and No Escape, Genie In A Crowd, Existence Is Violence, and Divide And Conquer.
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