Mitt Romney: Please Go Away

Flit around the country and run for anything – it’s the Romney way. This time the former Massachusetts Governor and presidential aspirant has his sites set on a Utah Senate seat. Earth to Mitt: from all of us to you, please just go away quietly into the night.

It’s doubtful we’ll get our wish. In his opening salvo on twitter Mr. Romney says he intends to “bring Utah’s values to Washington.” Alrighty then. Let’s hope he means Orrin Hatch’s values. But somehow, I don’t think so.

A Loser’s Advice

Granted, Romney did win the Massachusetts gubernatorial race. But perhaps therein lies the problem.  The Bay State isn’t exactly a bastion of conservatism. Yet here he is – again with more advice for us. Indeed Mr. Romney plans to “teach the nation” the Utah way. According to Mitt, this means “treating other people with respect, a balanced budget, an export-based economy and openness to immigration.

Let’s just unpack that for a moment, shall we?

Treating people with respect. Is this a little swipe at the president? Methinks it just could be. After all, unless he’s sitting down for dinner with him, Romney has had very little good to say about Trump – both before and after becoming president. That’s because Romney is oh so refined and Trump so gauche. Romney so civilized, and Trump so crude. But if we tease this out a little, it also means Trump knows how to win and Romney, well, not so much.

Indeed, you don’t have to read between the lines too far to recognize a putdown of President Trump in Romney’s opening salvo. The president, however, is a master at the counterpunch, and it’s doubtful it will take long for a short, sweet comeback from POTUS.

For the sake of time (and frankly because Romney is not worth much of it) let’s move onto his last jab at Trump: openness to immigration. Why thank you Lord Romney for this salient advice. Where would we be without your vast knowledge and your erudite ways? We understand from you that America has not had enough “openness” in our immigration. My, that’s prescient. In fact, if anything we’ve had too much openness. So, how’s that been working for us?

The Romney Problem

Already pundits are calling for a Romney win in Utah. Some are even calling it a cakewalk. Unfortunately, they may be right for a variety of reasons. Number one: Utah is Republican territory for the most part and number two, Mitt has enormous name recognition. Any politico worth his salt will tell you that just knowing a candidate’s name gives you a head start. In fact, these folks are already saying that Romney as a Senator from Utah is “nearly inevitable.”

In the carpet-bagger category, Romney makes Bobby Kennedy look like a school-boy. After all, Mitt grew up in Michigan and spent most of his life in Massachusetts. But – and these are two big “buts” -- his connection with Utah is two-fold: he resurrected the Salt Lake City Olympics way back in 2002, and he’s a Mormon. Thus, it’s doubtful he’ll have to pimp himself out too much to the good folks in Utah. No real pandering needed if it’s an “us” against “them” type of campaign. And why wouldn’t it be?

There’s really no way around it. For those who call themselves conservatives, this is clearly a blow. To go from Orrin Hatch who famously said “You are one heckuva leader” about Donald Trump to Mr. Romney – who can barely utter a decent word about the president -- is a step in the wrong direction. But as we know strange things can and do happen in politics, and for true conservatives, we can always (in the words of Jesse Jackson) “Keep Hope Alive.”