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Andrew Cuomo Tries to Shine Up the Hostile Socialists

Just when you think capitalism is dead in America, a far-left Democrat comes along and begs for the almighty private sector dollar. Andrew Cuomo, New York’s governor, is symbolically on his knees in front of Amazon’s Jeff Bezos, offering a scented foot scrubbing to entice the e-commerce giant in reconsidering building a satellite headquarters (HQ2) in the Big Apple.

The once heralded deal, which would have brought 25,000 high paying jobs to Long Island, is off the table after a handful of lawmakers, who believe capitalism should be replaced by socialism, felt their sphincters contract at the audacity of a good business deal. It was an opportunity to call out corporate greed, which backfired spectacularly.

Bezos is obviously fond of a free market and punished the state for electing another mouthy newbie by pulling the deal off the table.

And a mad scramble by adults in the state ensued.

No Time for Tomfoolery

An open letter published in The New York Times and signed by Cuomo, business owners, union leaders, and other politicians aimed to laugh off the actions of their petulant few and let Bezos know: “Opinions are strong in New York—sometimes strident. We consider it part of the New York charm!”

Andrew Cuomo

What the letter should have said is: “We apologize for electing these yahoos. Our bad.” Amazon, Cuomo, and New York City Mayor Bill de Blasio lay the epic loss of the HQ2 at the Mary Jane-clad feet of Rep. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez (-NY).

A statement issued by Bezos’ tech juggernaut clearly states that they have no time for the tomfoolery of AOC and her rabid followers. “For Amazon, the commitment to build a new headquarters requires positive, collaborative relationships with state and local elected officials who will be supportive over the long-term.”

Jodi Seth, head of policy communications for Amazon, doubled down. “It was that the environment over the course of the past three months had not got any better.”

Seth also stated that they’re done talking. Bezos has better-suited wooers that come without the baggage of being stuck with that precocious and charming AOC for the next two years.

Buh Bye Suckers

When Amazon announced on Valentine’s Day that they were heading to less hostile environs to spread the wealth around, AOC claimed the credit for herself and a few socialist friends. She tweeted her victory:

“Anything is possible: today was the day a group of dedicated, everyday New Yorkers & their neighbors defeated Amazon’s corporate greed, its worker exploitation, and the power of the richest man in the world.”

But, but, he was willing to share. In addition to the 25,000 jobs – which were all in the $150k a year range with benefits – Bezos’ behemoth would’ve brought a whopping $2.5 billion in investment long lacking in Long Island City, and the construction of at least eight million square feet of office space.

“Everyday New Yorkers” felt the sting of their congresswoman’s lack of representation and reacted with incredulity in the most charming way possible – with a billboard in Times Square proclaiming: “AMAZON PULLOUT, 25,000 lost NYC jobs, $4 billion in lost wages, $12 billion in lost economic activity. Thanks For Nothing AOC.”

AOC eloquently called their outrage “wack.” But it is truly she who is “whack” (that’s how it’s spelled, AOC), as the majority of New Yorkers favored bringing Bezos to town. Siena College found that 58% of folks living in New York City were on board, and with a further breakdown, reported that 70% of black New Yorkers and 81% Latinos welcomed an influx of wealth and future prosperity into their communities. And yes, statewide results mimicked the city’s favorable numbers. But when you are Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez, numerical facts are trivial.

Mea Freaking Culpa!

Cuomo and de Blasio have found themselves paddling the same life boat – and they aren’t known for having a warm and fuzzy bromantic relationship by any stretch. Yet they now have teamed up with unions, community leaders, business leaders, and even the ever-communist-leaning academic types and are begging for a do over. Capitalism does help folks pay the bills, and New York desperately want to keep the remaining middle classers to offset everyone else’s responsibilities.

In the meantime, in no rush, Bezos remains silent as the commoners skitter about attempting to find something, anything, that will please the king. So far, outright begging hasn’t worked.

Read More From Sarah Cowgill

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