Hospitality is one of the simplest voluntary acts in a free society. Government doesn't create it and technology can't replace it. Yet it still may be a disappearing art. We see the difference today in how people don’t have guests over to their homes as often, or how folks treat strangers and how customers are treated by employees. What is causing this decline in basic cordiality and manners?
Hospitality at Home and With Strangers
For generations, the home was where families, friends, and neighbors came together. Today, much of our social life has moved online or into businesses, leaving fewer opportunities to visit one another at home.
According to data from Bureau of Labor Statistics' American Time Use Survey, Americans spend a lot less time socializing than they did 20 years ago. In fact, average daily socializing declined from about 45 minutes to 35 minutes, and fewer people socialize with friends on any given day than they did a decade ago. As Axios pointed out, this matters because “It's a fundamental shift in the way we live our lives that has implications for everything from what we believe to how long we live."
Traditionally, home is where we practiced most of our hospitality. We had family dinners, or friends over for barbecues and to celebrate birthdays. Some had book clubs or Bible readings while others had game night or watched movies. The home used to be a great gathering place but not only is this not happening as much anymore, people are spending more time at home and alone. If we're home more than ever, why aren't our homes becoming gathering places?
A 2025 World Happiness Report found that about one in four Americans ate all of their meals alone in 2023 which was about a 53% increase from just ten years earlier. The way we used to socialize is disappearing and more Americans are becoming anti-social. This can be attributed to work-from-home setups, online chatting and shopping, and home deliveries. There’s just not the need or perhaps desire to go shopping with modern conveniences. Those who work strictly from home don’t personally interact with co-workers.
So what happens when homes stop being gathering places? Axios pointed out a few results such as, children have fewer chances to interact with adults outside their immediate family, friendships become appointment-based instead of spontaneous, and loneliness increases despite constant digital communication.
Social Manners Get Thrown Out the Door
Today’s society is all about instant gratification and results. We seem to have lost the most simplest of manners such as smiling at strangers, introducing ourselves to neighbors, or being sincere and thanking people for doing something.
There was a time when hospitality was pretty much a guarantee in customer service. Store owners and employees would personally greet repeat customers by name, walk them to the door, or just chat for a few minutes. Cashiers and service workers met customers with a smile and asked if they needed anything else. Today, it seems these types of employees barely look up from ringing up groceries, much less make eye contact or give a welcoming smile.
Many Americans feel that genuine hospitality is harder to find and researchers suggest this may be part of a broader cultural change where there’s employee burnout, disgruntled and even hostile customers, and workplaces that prioritize efficiency over manners and making a customer feel valued.
Georgetown University management professor Christine Porath studied incivility for more than 20 years and published an article in the Harvard Business Review about how it has grown in customer actions. She defines incivility as rudeness, disrespect, or insensitive behavior, according to Fortune.
“People are nastier than ever to frontline employees,” she told the outlet. “The effects are costly to those who serve us, witnesses, businesses, and society. I hope we improve.”
Porath’s survey conducted in 2022, found that 76% of frontline workers experienced rude behavior from customers at least once a month, 78% said customer rudeness is more common than it was five years earlier, and 73% said rude behavior is “not unusual.”
Gallup's 2026 State of the Global Workplace found employee engagement dropped to 20%, the lowest level since 2020. Gallup defines engagement as employees' "involvement and enthusiasm" for their work.
A 2025 Gallup article titled “Employee Detachment Threatens Customer Satisfaction” explained that the “decline of employee pride doesn’t just affect internal dynamics and productivity; it directly influences how organizations meet customer expectations, creating ripple effects on customer satisfaction. When employees disengage, customers feel it.”
Hospitality is one of those quiet traditions that no law can require and no government program can create. It grows from personal responsibility, kindness, and a willingness to put others before ourselves, if only for a few moments. It's easy to blame technology and busy schedules, but every act of hospitality is still a personal choice. In a society that often feels hurried and disconnected, choosing kindness, generosity, and welcome may be one of the most meaningful traditions worth bringing back.


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