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Christmas Comes Despite Joe Biden and the Bomb Cyclone

Bomb cyclones don’t stop folks in the middle of nowhere.

Editor’s Note: From the Back Forty is Liberty Nation’s longest-running and most popular weekly column. Capturing the truth each week from heartlanders in flyover states, LN gives voice to the hardworking Americans otherwise ignored by the coastal elites.

Despite a disappointing year filled with political losses, soaring inflation, and new levels of poverty in the wealthiest of nations, Heartlanders and flyover folks were again filled with hope by the Christmas season. Refusing to live in Joe Biden’s predicted long, dark and cold winter, the faithful friends gathered near and celebrated a year of friendships and blessings, even if just for a little while. A weather event, the Elliott winter storm sweeping through the upper and lower Midwest, was no match to the draw of a warm pub for a cocktail, firelit parlor at the neighbor’s house, or trek through the woods and tundra for the family homecoming. Bomb cyclones are no match for the folks in the middle of nowhere.

Santa vs Jesus

After a devastating few years of getting everything egregiously wrong, pollsters are out looking for new ways to insert themselves, politically. So, they searched for a new way to divide the nation: Is Christmas about Santa or Jesus? Rasmussen interviewed 1,000 American adults and found that Jesus is still the reason for the season for 57%. Only 22% picked the pudgy home intruder, and the rest were weirdly unable to decide how to answer the question. Surveyors also found that the holiday is celebrated by 90% of Americans, which is up from 85% two years ago.

Ask any hardworking Heartlander why they celebrate the holiday and the likely answer will reference the birth of Christ – but they also love The Claus. Patriot Peter Sabatino weighed in immediately, “I think Jesus would take [Santa] in the first round! Go, Jesus!” Then added, “A little Christmas humor, folks,” for those looking to debate.

Mary Stewart in Tuscaloosa, AL, also chimed in, “I would certainly hope so! Jesus is the celebration! Santa is a secular reminder of the joy of giving. As a Christian, I can tell you that it is ok to love him too! Merry Christmas everyone!” And Iowan Kenny Tilford embraced the whole scene – from nativity displays to chimney drops – as a good time for all: “Why not both? When explained correctly, Santa shows why we should give to others and spread joy, both of which are great lessons.”

Heartland Prefers Traditional Christmas

Local police recently investigated a festive Christmas decoration outside of one Kentucky home. It seems that clearly nearsighted folks called emergency services over a nearly naked man standing in the neighbors’ front yard. Dispatchers described, “He has a robe covering part of his body. He is exposing himself, and he has a hose between his legs.” Responding officers found Cousin Eddie emptying the RV’s waste tank. Yes, the one and only Cousin Eddie, made into a Christmas icon by the movie National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation. Homeowner Joni Keeney told local reporters, following the disturbing story, that her Christmas display was intended to put a smile on the faces of passers-by. And also, to remind folks that everyone has a “Cousin Eddie” in their family.

In Melville, LA, Charlene Murphy wondered if anyone in Kentucky had a sense of humor. Jeff King in Lexington sadly replied, “Great, we once again made national news. As if Mitch McConnell wasn’t embarrassing enough.”

But when all is said and done, Heartlanders of all kinds prefer family traditions passed down from greats and grandparents, adding in newer details as they grew and had families of their own. From Arizona, Dave Metcalf told Liberty Nation, “I always take my wife to dinner on Christmas Eve; then we go to Midnight Mass. Christmas morning, we open presents and then have a breakfast of eggs, tamales, and bacon/sausage. So, I refuse to let Biden ruin our Christmas, even if I have to take a second job to afford it.”

Mike McGee is in Utah, enjoying his Christmas as usual. “We have always been true to our Christmas Eve nachos; each bite, handmade to suit the taste of those eating them. I did it in my family as a kid; and that has been passed down.” He continued to describe these joyful events by thanking the Good Lord above, “God has always blessed us sufficiently for our needs. So, this year, we will have a big breakfast on Christmas Eve morning, and open pajamas, as per every Christmas. God bless each of you, and Merry Christmas!”

Native New Mexican Susanne Shanley never misses a beat on promoting family over the holidays. Full disclosure, I’ve been besties with this woman since we were kids, and she summed up the memories I recall during this time of homecoming:

You know my family has always gathered on Christmas Eve. We have a BIG family meal and open gifts. This way, the littles can wake up to Santa on Christmas morning, and it is all about them. Biden has no influence on the way we are living…we won’t let him. We just are not going to let his doings put us down. Looking to God, living our worth. America!”

And on that note, Merry Christmas to all from the middle of nowhere.

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