In a disturbing echo of the classic Dr. Seuss story “The Sneetches,” the relentless efforts of the progressive left to apply the mathematical principle of division to America is resulting in a stark, binary rendering of the nation into “them” and “us.” You see it everywhere in these days of false unity promised by a president who is delivering its antonym. Them and us.
In the children’s book by the late (and lately canceled) Theodor Geisel, a clever huckster named Sylvester McMonkey McBean seizes his chance to make a fast buck by playing off the social insecurities of the titular fuzzy, flightless yellow birds. Sneetches whom nature has blessed with stars on their bellies believe themselves superior to the Sneetches with “no stars upon thars.” These Sneetches are sad and mopey second-class citizens who watch with wounded envy as their “betters” gambol, galavant, and good-time gregariously. If only…
McBean invents a machine that affixes stars to the star-bereft Sneetches – and suddenly they’re in with the cool kids! But the elites (pardon – the “true” star-bellied Sneetches) are having none of it. They absolutely will not mix with the riff-raff Sneetches. So, they decide to remove their stars with an expensive, elective outpatient surgery that can be gotten simultaneously with Botox injections in order to keep their exclusivity and distinction. To assume that proper breeding, country club membership, and inner-woke can be conferred by merely attaching a star to one’s abdomen? The gall! (Sniff, sniff.)
Imagine the imperious sneer of old money at the excesses and extravagances of the nouveau riche, and you begin to get a sense of the withering disdain coastal elites hold in their hearts for those folks in flyover country who “cling to their guns or religion” and who obviously voted for Orange Hitler. They’re known as the Deplorables – those without stars upon thars. Or with. It can get confusing. Let’s just say anyone demonstrating viewpoint diversity.
You see and hear the real-time sneetchification of America when the president talks about Trump voters as “chumps,” “dregs,” and Neanderthals.” When he consults note cards to inveigh against the “scourge” of white supremacy sweeping our land, he’s implicating an entire race by association with a political phantom – the better to force-feed America critical race theory, my dear.
Hillary and Obama made it OK to speak honestly about the disgust and hatred they feel for those folks in undesirable zip codes with wrong opinions, and the left was finally unburdened of its need to mask their inner-most feelings about their ideological nemeses. Trump voters are gross. Is it possible to isolate, marginalize, and target them as radical Leninist Saul Alinsky would’ve encouraged?
Of course, it is. And speaking of which – let’s start with masking. By now, it’s clear that anyone not training for a socially distanced marathon on their Peloton bikes in a medical mask is an anti-science deplorable. Those Americans without masks are effectively star-free Sneetches. They have no virtue – obviously – so that’s why they helpfully choose to advertise their gauche beliefs by eschewing virtue muzzles. Telling the intelligent, educated, morally correct Americans from the low-born dissenting ones is now as easy as glancing about outdoors to see who’s wearing a mask and who isn’t. Sneetch/Un-Sneetch.
And what about vaccination? Star-bellied Sneetches queue up eagerly in Soviet-style bread lines to witlessly join an international medical experiment free of pesky long-term safety trials because that’s what good people do. This is a win-win for the white hats and another way to draw the all-important distinctions between right and wrong. The Sneetches with store-bought signs on their front lawns saying “We Believe in Science in This House” get the protection of a jab against mild COVID-19 symptoms while signaling the vast virtue they possess at having done so – even as they are free to exercise their right to judge those who choose otherwise.
No matter that no unequivocal evidence exists that the vaccine stops transmission of the virus and that worrying someone else isn’t wearing a life vest when you’ve got one on is profoundly unscientific and illogical. Only idiots and MAGA hat lovers are vaccine-hesitant. You couldn’t devise a better litmus test. Making domestic and international travel and attendance of concerts and sporting events dependent on COVID vaccine compliance is another way to separate the buy-in Sneetches from the buy-out. And the president is inanely carrot-and-sticking America when he tells us to get the vaccine so we can go outside without a mask – even as he goes outside with a mask.
The battle lines are drawn and the war to discern good Sneetches from bad is worthy of another verse in The Star-Spangled Banner. Top shelf star-bellied Sneetches engage in “peaceful protests” all across America, causing a billion dollars in property damage and multiple deaths. Sneetches without stars lead “armed insurrections” against the federal government and bash in officer’s heads with fire extinguishers, because a former newspaper, The New York Times, said so. They said so – but they lied, so…
Sneetches of impeccable virtue want to defund the police because policing in America is a cesspool of racism and because the police are one of the remaining institutions not utterly infiltrated and controlled by the woke left. Deplorably star-free Sneetches understand that “reimagining” policing is just code for abolishing it, fomenting chaos which elite Sneetches will survive by hiring private police.
Sneetches in power want to take away the firearms of America-first Sneetches who cherish the right of self-defense against a rapacious and over-reaching federal government that wants to control America from one city. Lesser Sneetches understand that this is just a power grab prologue.
And Silicon Valley Sneetches, Federal Sneetches, and Fourth Estate Sneetches all work together to suppress the right of debased Sneetches to express themselves freely as per the wisdom of our Founding Sneetches, as codified in the Bill of Sneetch Rights. The love affair with efficacy-free masks has given the ruling class Sneetches a great idea: how about muzzles for the Star-free Sneetches so that the First Amendment will be moot? They’ll all be on mute – as it was during the brilliantly successful international campaign to control Sneetches worldwide – also known as the pandemic.
Maybe the clever, coastal Sneetches were on to something with the ruse of dropping their own stars and letting deplorable Sneetches get stars upon thars. With a system of visible yellow stars to show who is acceptable and who isn’t, it’ll be much easier to know who to subjugate. Is it time to “reimagine” power using McMonkey McBean’s strategies?
After all – it worked for one evil Sneetch back in the 1930s.
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