This is an open letter to you, Chelsea Handler, to express my gratitude. As a recovering black white supremacist, I want to thank you for helping me understand that I am not inferior to anyone because of the color of my skin.
In a recent segment on your Netflix show, you discussed the different types of racists in America. One of the categories of racists you identified were black white supremacists. You stated that these folks are “black people who think white people are better than them.”
Dr. Ben Carson was one of the people you named as an example of a confused black person who believes that their skin color makes them inferior. You also brought up Sheriff David Clarke and actress Stacey Dash. What do all these people have in common? They’re conservatives.
I must admit that I initially believed that the idea of a black white supremacist was nothing more than a silly Dave Chappelle skit, but you have shown me the light. Black people who are not leftists apparently believe that whites are the superior race.
I have grown to understand your reasoning. White liberals have always treated black Americans with respect – even when they are racist. You’re a prime example.
You have not been afraid to set us straight when we need it – even if it means making racist remarks about us. Sometimes we get a little uppity, so we need white liberals like yourself to knock us down a peg – it’s the only way we can feel like we matter.
Two years ago you took on comedian Nick Cannon when he announced he was going on tour. You tweeted: “I just heard Nick Cannon is starting a comedy tour. Who’s going to do the comedy?” Cannon, responded to your comment by tweeting “Wow @chelseahandler I actually used to have respect for you as a comic. But for one artist to diss another in the same art form. #Tasteless.”
True to form, you came back with your own witty rejoinder, “@nickcannon pls drink this before you tweet me again.” And what did you want him to drink? Grape soda! But you didn’t stop with Nick Cannon. Even rapper and entrepreneur (and your ex-boyfriend) 50 Cent couldn’t escape your wrath.
According to The Root, you had a disagreement with Curtis Jackson – that’s 50 Cent, just in case you didn’t get his real name – over the fact that you wanted to interview a woman he had dated.
You told Howard Stern that you “called him the worst thing you could say to a black person, short of calling him the n-word.” You said that he was, “like a street person.” Or, “something along the lines of being a gangster.” Then, in a show of racial acceptance, you hung up.
Put 50 Cent to Shame
If that didn’t give Mr. Jackson something to think about, I don’t know what will. Your friends told you that “You will never hear from him. This is, like, a proud black man you basically tore apart and put to shame.”
It’s true. Curtis Jackson worked hard to get out of the “street” life and to make something of himself. Now that he’s a millionaire, he needed a white liberal woman to remind him where he came from – that no matter how much success Jackson achieves, he’s still just a “street person” at heart. I’m sure he regrets losing you.
Ms. Handler, some might think you are a racist. They may believe that telling Nick Cannon to drink grape soda and calling 50 Cent a “street person” is somehow bigoted. However, these people don’t understand that we are genetically predisposed to love grape soda – and fried chicken. And seriously, what black person doesn’t have at least a little bit of “street” in them?
I want you to know that I disagree with those who think you are a bigot who hides behind your left-wing facade. You said yourself that you are not racist because you “date a lot of black people.” That’s good enough for me. However, there is an issue that is far more important than all of this: self-hating black Americans who do not embrace liberal ideas.
You see, I used to believe that black Americans could have all types of different opinions without hating their own race. For some reason, I thought a black person could adopt conservative values while still having pride in their culture. Yes, I now realize how silly this sounds, but I was deceived.
Ms. Handler, You Showed Me How Wrong I Was
From you, I learned that any black person who wants Donald Trump to be a successful president is a boot-licking Uncle Tom who believes whites are the better race. He is no better than a house negro who always seeks his master’s favor.
Even though Dr. Ben Carson was raised in poverty by a single mother in the city of Detroit, he can’t possibly know anything about the black experience in America. Even though he became one of the world’s leading neurosurgeons, he cannot understand that one’s skin color does not determine their worth.
Dr. Carson knows nothing of the inherent value of the black community because he is not a leftist. On the other hand, you, Chelsea Handler, understand what it is to be a proud black person.
As a blonde, white, liberal woman, you have seen our struggles and mocked them. The truth is that while Dr. Carson may have grown up as a poor black man, you have slept with a number of black men, which makes you infinitely more qualified to determine who is a “black white supremacist.”
Thank you, Ms. Handler, for saying what needed to be said. Where would the black community be if we didn’t have white, liberal, celebrity women telling us what to believe? I pray we never find out.
A self-confessed news and political junkie, Jeff’s writing has been featured in Small Business Trends, Business2Community, and The Huffington Post. Born in Southern California and having experienced the 1992 L.A. Riots up close and personal, Jeff's insights are informed by his experiences as a black man and a conservative.