With his boyish good looks, fat wallet, and the hottest chick in America on his arm, Jared Kushner is emerging as the boy-wonder in the Trump administration. From his cushy west wing office (a very short walk from the Oval Office), the all-access pass to meetings with foreign leaders and the ability to jettison off to the Middle East for a boots on the ground scoop from the troops, young Mr. Kushner is garnering attention from the left, right and all points in between. And it appears that his presence, so prominent in Trumpville, is irritating absolutely everyone who have had the unfortunate fate of crossing his path.
Whatever did he do to infuriate America to such a degree? Oh, yeah, I remember now, he has repeatedly proven, time and again, that blood is thicker than water. This man is loyal to a fault and outsiders and enemies should pay close attention to the mechanics of his meteoric rise in the political ranks.
To rehash a bit for Kushner newbies, Jared is a thirty-six-year-old Harvard graduate, son of real estate mogul and Democratic Party mega-donor, billionaire Charles Kushner. A fairly devout Jew, Kushner attended a yeshiva high school In New Jersey and was by all accounts, a mediocre student with few academic achievements to boast. Where he shed his pedestrian blandness, morphing into the man who landed Ivanka Trump, converting her to his Jewish faith, to become the hard-driving, ambitious prodigal son-in-law to Trump cannot be accurately pinpointed. His progress is not unlike the squirmy caterpillar that evolves into a butterfly—a Monarch, of course.
And this butterfly has teeth. Back in 2005, when Papa Kushner walked too close to the dark side, he, unfortunately, attracted the intense scrutiny of Governor Chris Christie (R-NJ). Better than an episode of Peyton Place, Kushner staged an epic ‘got ya’ against his sister to gain the upper hand in a real estate deal, effectively pushing sister Esther down the proverbial bunny trail:
…investigators had discovered that he (Charles Kushner) had staged a vicious retaliation plot against his sister Esther’s husband, luring him into an encounter with a prostitute that he taped for use as blackmail.
Christie, unimpressed with the charming elder of clan Kushner, dispatched him to the federal Big House in Alabama–a two-year stint for tax evasion and Jury tampering, and a whole docket of potential crimes against nature. Young Jared was appalled at how his father was treated, and stated, on the record, that this was a simple family squabble and the government should have stayed out of it. Yes, I agree it was a simple family squabble. (The Corleone-Godfather family kind of squabble, but still.) You get the gist. In retaliation, to the epic retaliation, Jared purchased the beleaguered New York publication, The Observer, roundhouse kicked the staff to the smog-laden streets of the city and began using the publication to reinstate his family name to one of esteemed greatness once again.
Fast forward to campaign 2016. Donald J. Trump has just steamrolled sixteen high profile Republicans and emerged as the chosen one on the GOP ticket. The forgotten middle class, from sea to shining sea, celebrated in the streets praising the Gods that be, at being finally released from the shackles of the tired old party elite. One minuscule problem, however, presented itself to the Trump tribe—the Republican Party were sickened that their people, the true patriot, flag-waving party faithful, had brazenly given the universal gesture of disapproval, en masse, and with stubborn resolve, pulled the pin on the grenade, and chucked the explosive in the direction of the establishment. Threats were made to those foolish enough to try and board the Trump Train that they ‘would never work in politics again—anywhere.’ Sore losers the lot of them.
Enter wonder boy, Jared, who wrestled control of the chaotic campaign and went about raising money and hiring speechwriters, polishing the appearance and demeanor of father-in-law Trump to a sheen never imagined. He was asked, at one point last fall, by the Observer, Hillary or Donald? The press, ever eager to stir the pot, was hoping that Kushner’s liberal roots would prevail. Again, Kushner without hesitation replied, “family first.”
He has the President’s ear as is evident with the recent flip-flop of Stephen Bannon’s inner-circle necessity for Trump. Perhaps the celebrated bromance the two men shared on the campaign trail has finally cooled, and Trump has realized Bannon is not a flexible man on anything less than full conservative government domination—which is hardly Trump’s style. Instead, Trump may be tentatively taking a few steps backward to reassess his most coveted presidential talent; that of an unequaled negotiator on Capitol Hill. Without question, Jared had something to do with that about face.
America, take a deep breath in and exhale slowly. We knew this would be an interesting, possibly even amusing first few months in Trumpville. Regardless, the nation is in capable hands with the newly empowered dynasty—and the extended family overhauling the West Wing. Heck, just let them paint it all gold.
